Mmmmm

Pepperidge Farm Double Chocolate Milano cookies. I'm eating one as I type here at work. Yummy.

And Now For Something Completely Different

Live from...the ladies room, it's CNN's Kyra Phillips.
It wouldn't be as amusing if someone other than President Bush were speaking.

Deja Vu

BACK THERE

Smart Dog or Dumb Owner?

Look out! Look out! Turn the damn wheel! Woof!

BEIJING (AP) -- A woman in Hohhot, the capital of north China's Inner Mongolia region, crashed her car while giving her dog a driving lesson, the official Xinhua News Agency said Monday. No injuries were reported although both vehicles were slightly damaged, it said.

The woman, identified only be her surname, Li, said her dog "was fond of crouching on the steering wheel and often watched her drive," according to Xinhua. "She thought she would let the dog 'have a try' while she operated the accelerator and brake," the report said. "They did not make it far before crashing into an oncoming car."

Xinhua did not say what kind of dog or vehicles were involved but Li paid for repairs.

No More PS2 Woe

Well, somehow when The Little One knocked over the unit, the disk inside got damaged. The unit will load and play other games without a problem. Only the game I was playing won't load. Oh well, it could have been worse.

Play Station 2 Woes

I was playing Madden NFL this afternoon and had the unit standing upright on the floor. The Little One came walking into the room and at first, only walked up to the television and kissed one of the players. Then she turned around and first touched the PS2 and then proceeded to push it over. It landed flat and the sound went out but that was from the cable in the back coming partly loose from the tussle. I plugged it back in and the game played fine. Later this evening, I decided to get in a quick game and to my woe, the game wouldn't start. I reset and then only the PS2 configuration screen would come on. After about 20 minutes I decided to tackle the problem later and turned it off. This could be the *perfect* excuse for buying a PS3 when it comes out. Hmmm.

Dumb...Dumber

The first part is just plain dumb. Should have just made them wear a uniform.

If there's an air marshal on your flight, you're not supposed to be able to tell who he is. And in order to help protect the anonymity of air marshals, the rules on how they dress and where they stay will be changing.

Marshals had complained that when they were on a flight to Hawaii, they could easily be picked out from among the vacationers because of their jackets and collared shirts. So from now on, they'll be able to dress the way they want.

They'll also be able to choose their own hotels. This could solve the problem that was uncovered in a recent report to Congress. It found that a Sheraton in Florida had designated the Federal Air Marshal Service "company of the month" because of the number of rooms it had reserved there. Again, not the best way to keep a low profile.

The hotel part is just dumber.

Character Fight

Who would win a match between these two?

"Helloooo, Newman."

"Helloooo, Jerry."

Mentos + Diet Coke Evolution

I can see lots of ways this trick could go very bad...

Today Is Tuesday

Today is Tuesday, you know what that means,
We're gonna have a special guest.
So get out the broom and sweep the place clean,
And dust off the mat so the welcome can be seen.

Roll out the carpet, strike up the band,
And give out with a Hip Hooray! Hip Hooray!
Wiggle your ears like good Mouseketeers,
We're gonna present a guest today.

'Cause Tuesday is Guest Star Day!


Words & Music by Jimmie Dodd

Liar, Liar, Pants On Fire

Am I dysfunctional or what? I realized today that I find some profound pleasure in catching someone in a lie. I know they are lying and I can see how they are trying so hard to make everything sound like they aren't lying. They just keeping getting deeper in the hole that they are digging. And I egg them on, too. I make it so they have to come up with another lie to cover their first one. I'm so bad.

Texas Rangers Win The World Series!

Not. Well, they did in High Heat Baseball for the PS2. The Rangers were up against the New York Mets and swept the series. Yes, I spent way too much time playing the season and my wife was not pleased. But what can I say? I'm a video game addict. Now, on to Madden NFL.

Another Well Spent Saturday

This is my second Saturday in a row at work. Like I don't have anything else to do. And it's not raining either...yet. Yay, work!

Buying Gas

Rain, Rain, and More Rain

Aaagg! More stupid rain yesterday. More stupid flooding. If that's not bad enough, afterwards, there's so much debris like rocks (boulders) and plants in the roadways that driving becomes an adventure. And there's more rain in the forecast for today, too. Oh, and my yodeling class was cancelled.

Bad Vibes?

I've been thinking. Our bodies are being exposed to so many "waves" nowadays. Broadcast waves, microwaves, WiFi, radio waves, cellular telephones...The list goes on. These must be affecting our bodies in some way even minutely speaking. If we hop into our Time Machine and travel back a couple of hundred years, most of these waves didn't exist. So, my point is, did people *feel* better back then? I mean physically. You know, less headaches, joint pain, nearsightedness, intestinal distress? Those kinds of things. I'm guessing people felt better then. This correlation could be debated but I'm getting a call on my cell phone so it will have to wait for another day.

Skier Eludes Death's Grip

Hard to believe. Only eight lives left.

Numbers Quiz

Guess the significance of the following numbers (some might have more than one):

666 - The number of the beast; Iron Maiden album

• 90210
• 1984
• 007
• 3.14159
• 2112
• $6,000,000
• 451
• 867-5309
• 42
• 1492
• KL5-4796

Playing With Fish

I was browsing the games section of Yahoo today and came across Fish Tycoon. You have to breed and care for fish in a real-time aquarium and also sell fish that you breed to make money so you can breed even more interesting and exotic species of fish. Interesting...It kept my attention for about half an hour. Now if they would make a "Tycoon" game simulating operating a gazillion screen multiplex theater, that would be fun. Of course you would start the game with only one screen but depending on your decisions, you can modernize and add additional screens and ticket booths and concession stands and game rooms and additional bathrooms and stadium seating and...Well, you get the point. :-)

Name Calling

Have you ever seen them? Cars and trucks with the driver's and/or passenger's name inscribed with stickers on the back window? I don't care for them at all. Probably something to do with my hang-up on privacy issues and such. But they do come in handy for me sometimes. It's not every day when a car cuts you off and you get the privilege of venting your peeve personally at the next stop light. "Hey, Raul! Where'd you get your license, Jackass!?!" Much better than hand signals.

Scott Feels Safer

Cynical, yet funny, here.

Immigrants Sewn Into Van Seats

Just goes to show how far some will go to try to get into the United States illegally. Three immigrants were found sewn into the seats of a van driven by a U.S. citizen crossing the U.S.-Mexico border. Customs and Border Protection officials said the driver *appeared* nervous so they sent him into secondary inspection. He was arrested for smuggling.

Sorry About That

Talk about claustrophobia...

ZURICH, Switzerland (AP) -- An 85-year-old woman was found in the vault of a Swiss bank when she set off motion detectors hours after the bank was already closed, according to a statement released Wednesday.

Employees at the Zuercher Kantonalbank apparently forgot about the woman. The director of the bank's safe allowed the woman into the vault on Monday before closing it punctually at 4:30 p.m. local time - with the woman still deep in study of her documents, ZKB said.

She remained so still that she initially failed to activate either the motion detector or the attached camera, the bank said in confirming a report that appeared in the Zurich-based daily "Tages-Anzeiger."

She was freed from the room four hours after the vault was closed. The bank gave the woman a bouquet of flowers for suffering from the ordeal and said it would decide on further nonfinancial compensation.

No Thanks

I tried a bottle of Coca-Cola BlaK this evening. It's a fusion of Coke and coffee. Kind of sounds nifty but...Yuck!

I've Decided...

That life would be less complicated and less stressful if I had a familiar to do my bidding. That is if I didn't have to get involved in all that satanic stuff or sell my soul to have one. I would prefer it to take the form of a dog or cat or maybe even an iguana. I wouldn't want a toad or a chicken, though. It would be difficult to explain away the toad or chicken sitting on my lap to the casual observer. Well, it's just a passing thought.

Jesus?

Does anyone really know what Jesus looked like? To me, that could be Rob Zombie I see in the shrimp tail.

What A Week

Talk about stress. Severe weather...lots of rain. Flooding around town from the rain. The river almost cresting and threatening to flood more areas. Evacuations near the city center for fear of a dam breaching. And I also had to get a flat tire repaired. Although my family was spared from any hardship, I really feel for all those families who lost so much. Hopefully the city will analyze what worked and didn't work as far as all the flooding went and will make some improvements or whatever they need to do to avoid this from happening again. They've got say, around 50 years before a repeat of this occurs.

Some Flood Pictures

A delivery truck caught in the flood waters

A major street turned into a river

This is a friend's old house on a corner while the water was still low

This is part of a six-lane street which turned into a river

A relatively new Blockbuster (less than a year old)

This is my street about a mile south from where I live

A usually busy intersection

The river trying to crest

Flooding

I get to leave work early. It's been raining here since 3 A.M. at a steady clip and a few down pours occasionally. The river has overflowed its banks and the canal has also, and the water is currently flooding the levee. Many streets are closed due to the flooding and we've decided to send everyone home. Some of the bridges back to home have shut down due to access roads flooding. What a day!